I want to offer 1 simple step to transformation… I have come a long way, in my journey. I have overcome some huge obstacles and beaten the odds. But yet I still struggle in certain areas of my life. I’m still not satisfied with where I am. I still want more than I have. I still feel insignificant at times and un-important. I still look for ways to fit in and be known for something great. I still long for attention and recognition, and not receiving it causes unhappiness, unfulfillment and even depression at times.
I am so grateful and thankful that I’m not where I use to be, but if I’m honest, I am still not where I want to be. I want to be healthy, wealthy, and happy. I want to be able to make a difference in peoples lives and help them. I want to be that encourager that people come to. I want to be that friend that people look to. I want to be that lover that my wife is drawn to.
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Sometimes it’s hard to see what’s important… When my son was born there were some complications. He wasn’t breathing well, so they took him to the ICU and hooked him up to a lot of machines. His mom was recovering from the surgery, so I was the only one able to go and see him. I remember how scared I was for him and for us that day. This was our first child, our son, the child we had been praying for.
As I approached his small bed, my heart was raising and felt like it had dropped down to my stomach. All I could see were tubes and wires running everywhere. When I came around to the side of the bed, tears running down my face, I reached over and placed my hand on his tiny head and rubbed it gently. I will never forget the feeling of that moment. (As I am writing this post, I am reminded by tears of emotions.) While I was rubbing his head he opened his bright blue eyes and looked at me. It was more than just a look though, it was an acknowledgment and an awareness. He could have looked anywhere in the room, it was his first day on this earth, but he chose to look my direction and see me.
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“When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child; but when I became a man, I put away childish things.“(1Cor. 13:11)
Everyone matures at different rates. A 40-year-old adult may act like a teenager, and conversely, a teenager may act like a 40-year-old adult. It all depends on your emotional state. What you have learned growing up and what you have been exposed to or adapted to, play a major part in your development and maturity. I was a child long after the age of a child. Even today, I am emotionally and spiritually immature in a lot of ways and sometimes feel as if I do not fit in.
Continue reading It’s Okay To Not Fit In